Individual Psychotherapy, Couple and Parent Counseling

Ron Steck, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist

My aim is to assist clients in being happier, healthier, and stronger as they encounter the hurdles that different phases of life can bring. Whether those hurdles are internal, interpersonal or professional, most clients walk out of sessions feeling understood, really seen, smarter about themselves and their situation, and with real tools to positively affect their lives. Often interpersonal relationships prove the most challenging over time, triggering defensive/protective reactions that usually make things worse. Assisting couples through precarious times is a specialty, including addressing communication breakdowns, increasing closeness, reducing animosity, or dealing with jealousy and affairs.

I am familiar with a variety of therapeutic approaches and can be agile when needed to make sure clients feel both supported, and challenged. Often these approaches can lead to identifying lifelong patterns, developing awareness about these patterns, and ultimately experiencing the ability to choose rather than simply react. I like to work both in the present here-and-now where we can impact behavior, and explore the foundational experiences of the past in order to make lasting changes and establish new ways of dealing with people and problems
.


Silicon Valley Relationships Tips

Working in the valley is not without its hazards, especially if you are in a relationship. The high-pressure
and demanding work environment in hi-tech companies doesn't seem to let up. There's always another
deadline, another crunch time, customers to satisfy, and corporate mouths to feed. The toll on relationships is often significant, sometimes devastating, and sometimes creating a slow but steady march towards relationship misery.
I have watched and worked with many couples struggling with a number of issues related to working in hi-tech companies:
  • Long weekday hours and weekends spent away from the family
  • Partnersfeeling like single parents
  • Depleted energy for connection and sex
  • Anxiety over performance comparisons with work peers
  • Partners feeling sidelined and unimportant compared to the job
  • Stress over the inability to please two "masters" (work and home)
  • Depression and loneliness
  • Affairs in the workplace (emotional and sexual)

Couples need a conscious and flexible strategy for surviving effects of this valley over the long haul. Here are some areas to consider making adjustments:

  • Claiming more time for each other by setting boundaries with work, utilizing sitters, cleaners, etc. to clear time, and
    making and honoring date nights.

  • Make the most of your time by striking the right balance between face to face (direct attention on each other) and shoulder-to-shoulder activities (shared enjoyable experiences), and making sure you are emotionally, energetically, and intellectually available to connect. And some final tips, don't let logistics kill date nights, play and have fun together, and take each others' temperature about how things are going for them and what's wanted and needed.

  • Remember doing relationships well requires intention and focus, while doing relationships badly takes no effort at all.

 

881 Fremont Avenue., Suite B-5, Los Altos, CA 94024 (650) 559-0773 ext. 323